Today, I met up with one of my friends from UCLA, who was visiting from Chicago. As we sipped our delicious chai from Teaism, my friend noted that she feels that her friendships are much stronger post-college because they require much more work. I admire her because she is good at working on those friendships, she takes initiative to visit towns to see people and makes concrete plans.
As much initiative as I take in many areas of my life, I would say that I am not that great pro-actively sustaining "deep" friendships. It cannot simply be my fear of the phone, my busy law school schedule, or the fact that I rather spend time with my family when I am at home. There must be some other reason why I am friends with many people, but have more meaningful friendships with a very small number of individuals. Oh commitment issues.
Honestly, this problem does not keep me up late at night though. I do prefer quality over quantity of friends, but it was just a thought and a personal reminder of something I know I need to work on at least a little.
2 comments:
I'm impressed my comments made you think.
I think that being out of school helps develop friendships too - I'm no longer constantly stimulated by different people as part of a school environment, forcing me to look for the kind of stimulation i know i need. (aka, being really busy)
I definitely think you're right. When I am constantly surrounded by people at school, even at a superficial level, I don't feel the need to pursue more human interaction. In fact, I probably am a "hermit" because I crave down-time.
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