On one episode of Hey Dude, one of my favorite Nickelodeon shows, Brad couldn’t think of a talent for the ranch pageant so she countered Melanie’s singing “Home on the Range” with a luggage packing routine. Not only do I think I could beat Brad in a pack-off, I also think I could beat most people at getting through airport security. I can take off my jacket and boots, take out my laptop, load my bags on the conveyor belt, and get through the metal detector in a flash.
My friends might joke around with me and call me a fascist for different reasons, but I would consider it if I could do with planes what Mussolini did with the trains. Kidding, of course.
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